No Christmas for Immigrants!

Today’s post is brought to you by the Salvation Army who have decided that it would be “super christmassy” to release a statement denouncing gays and to demand that gift recipients in Texas show their social security cards before getting any Christmas presents for their children, because nothing shows the love of Christ like refusing to help foreigners whose kids have no toys.


OK, so in some technology news the lost e-mails from the Bush administration have been found. You remember right? Congress subpoenaed the e-mails a few years ago and the White House responded by deleting, I mean losing, I mean what e-mails? So in the end the ex-President said that no e-mails were missing and then, the other day, the not missing e-mails were found ... all 22 million of them! I can see how they could be over looked, after all 25 million e-mails would be obvious, but I over look the first 22 million messages in my “in box” all the time. So now we can see what they were hiding right? Right? Wrong. Federal regulations do not allow for the e-mails in question to become public until 2014 because the clock does not begin ticking for release until they are received by the National Archives. So right about the time that no one alive cares anymore, you’ll be able to peruse the correspondence Bush doesn’t want you to see. That’s comforting.

In crazy Italian news, the Prime Minister of Italy was hit in the face with a model of a gothic cathedral while he was signing autographs. If looking at the photographs of the aftermath on Silvio Berlusconi’s face tell us anything it’s that Milan needs to stop selling souvenirs made of granite. It’s not that bad? No, it’s that bad ... he’s got broken teeth, a broken nose and his lip is busted apart. Massimo Tartaglia, the loon who did it has some history of mental “issues”, that history now includes attacking heads of state with little churches ... Massimo has since thought better of the attack and written the P.M. a letter, from jail, apologizing for his “... cowardly actions...” he was not instantly pardoned upon recipt of the letter. I’m shocked. So before you get on the secret service for letting a blond and her idiot husband into a White House function ... just be glad that President Obama isn’t having his face smashed in by crazy model enthusiasts.
Berlusconi has blamed a “culture of hate” for the attack ... cuz people don’t like him and have been posting praise for the attacker on the internet. I know nothing about the guy, but when the people you represent are happy that you get your face smashed in ... it’s time to rethink what you’re doing. Maybe it’s time to find a whole new career, maybe you could charge people to dunk you in a dunk tank ... just a thought.

In history rising from the dead and talking to us news, Soviet General Victor Yermakov, who commanded the Soviet forces in Afghanistan from 1982-1983, made a statement earlier this week and in it he stated that, “We did not succeed and you will not either, they (the Afghan people) did not trust us and they will not trust you either.” and Russian ambassador to Afghanistan Zamir Kabulov decided to chime in by adding, “There is no mistake made by the Soviet Union that the international forces have not repeated.” HOW DARE YOU SIR! What do those commies know about Afghanistan any way? I refuse to believe that a couple of old Russians could possibly know more than President ...oh ... really ... they did what? ...they already tried to stabilize Afghanistan by invading and forcing diverse ethnic and tribal groups to submit to a central authority that they had propped up in Kabul?
It didn’t work?
Who knew.
Alright so maybe the commies know about this whole “Afghan invasion” thing ... but they didn’t have truth, justice and the American Way in their side. So here’s how it’s totally different, When Mikhail Gorbachev came to power in 1985 he expressed impatience with the Soviet war in Afghanistan and demanded that a solution be found with-in a one year deadline. As a result the Soviet forces were increased to 108,800, fighting increased, and 1985 became the bloodiest year of the war. Despite heavy casualties, the resistance to Soviet occupation never lessened and 4 years later the great Red Army went home in complete defeat. See, that’s nothing like Obama wanting a deadline, increasing troop deployment to over 100,000 and fighting against an insurgency that cannot be defeated.
What do you mean it’s exactly the same thing?
When we bring our troops home in 4 years we will have victoriously changed nothing at all in Afghanistan ... well, we did get the Taliban to invade Pakistan. Those guys had it coming.

And finally, in personal news ... don’t listen to my wife who had decided to accuse me of knocking over the Christmas tree twice on her blog lovelaughterandonecrazylife.blogspot.com, it was clearly her fault that the tree fell over and since there was noone there to witness it, you’re just going to have to take my word for it ... pretty much everything else she accused me of is true ... except the whole nail thing, it was only one nail, and well ... alright, I’m a bit ashamed of that one.